


Nostalgie de la boue

by Quilly



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, HSWC Bonus Round 2, about kanaya, and terezi is a dirty dirty enabler, but i think it applies don't you, in which aradia isn't interested, so much as mesmerized, yes i admit it i stole that joke from another comic i read long ago, zahhaks and their pretty hair and flawless butts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-26
Updated: 2014-06-26
Packaged: 2018-02-06 06:39:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1848157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quilly/pseuds/Quilly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>French, “yearning for mud.” Used to describe the feeling of being attracted to that which is depraved or below one’s station.</p>
<p>Or, Aradia is distracted by Equius' unfair advantage.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nostalgie de la boue

**Author's Note:**

> Last one from round 2!

Your name is Aradia Megido and _ew_.  
  
You blame Nepeta for your current predicament. She’s his moirail, and it makes it a little weirder, but she’s the one who first drew your attention to Equius’ butt and now you can’t stop staring every time he comes around. He’s sweaty and disgusting and has weird hoofbeast fetishes and is so disgustingly prejudiced it makes you physically ill. Why does all that come with a butt sculpted by some kind of heavenly being with a vendetta against you?  
  
It’s not fair, you think viciously as you tidy your hive for your upcoming Troll Dungeons and Dragons session, it’s unfair and stupid and—  
  
A knock at the door.  
  
Nepeta is always first to arrive, and she always brings…the Butt, that’s just what you’ll call him, nobody needs to know that you mean his literal backside as well as his personality. Today is no exception; Nepeta and The Butt are indeed there at your hive. Nepeta bounds in and hugs you and chatters a mile a minute, and you nod along and ignore The Butt and offer snacks. The Butt refuses, of course, because The Butt always refuses, like he’s afraid he’s going to catch some lowblood disease by interacting too closely with you. You’d like to slap The Butt so hard…okay, no, the name isn’t working, you want to slap Equius so hard. In his face. Not on the butt. Maybe a little on the butt. No!  
  
Vriska, Tavros, and Terezi show up sooner or later, and Eridan waltzes in like he owns the place well into the adventure, but you crowd him into it and continue DMing like you’ve been doing for weeks now. The campaign would be a lot further along if Eridan wasn’t “fashionably” late every single time, but you have since learned to accept that Eridan will do what Eridan wants and short of dragging him by the horns you can’t force him into much.   
  
Out of the corner of your eye Equius shifts on your couch, and when he notices your eyes on him he breaks out into blue sweat. You wrinkle your nose. Gross. It’s a lot easier to hate him when he’s sitting.  
  
Your mind strays to forbidden paths all through the session; if anyone notices you accidentally slipping words like bottom and rump into the adventure where they don’t necessarily belong, they don’t comment, too wrapped up in fiercely fighting each other for loot and XP. You keep looking at Equius, who keeps looking at you, and you wonder to yourself if the reason he likes that nude musclebeast art so much is because he feels like he needs to compensate for something. Why would you think that? That’s dumb.  
  
When the adventure closes for the night and everybody is sitting around in your hive, unwilling to go home but getting bored, you sit in your armchair and you seethe a little at your distraction. It’s not healthy, you think as Equius gets up and goes to the window across from you, it’s sick and weird and…and…  
  
Dear gog you just wanna grab a couple handfuls and _squeeze_ , how does anybody have a plush rump that’s actually plush like that?  
  
“Aradia?”  
  
You break out of your reverie to look at Terezi, who’s been trying to get your attention. She gives you a sly grin and a wink, though a little bit off from your actual direction.  
  
“What?” you ask, scandalized.  
  
“Enjoying the view?” she says innocently.  
  
You decide to play it brash, since that gets better results from Terezi. “Aren’t you? Just look at it! It’s obscene!”  
  
“Aradia, I am blind,” she says patiently, and you color a little maroon around the ears. Her grin sharpens. “I can smell it, though!” Her tongue flicks out to moisten her lips. “Hot stuff.”  
  
Equius turns around at the sound of your snorting giggles, and you very firmly ignore him until he turns back around.


End file.
